Monday, November 21, 2005

It's All Relative

Being a mother of twin babies is no easy task. People constantly stop me on the streets and comment about how difficult it must be to care for twins.  Common remarks I hear are “double trouble” and “wow, it must be a lot of work.”  

I often reply with a smile and brief comment such as “it’s a double blessing” or “it’s a lot of fun.”

Becoming a parent has been a rite of passage.  Life is no longer just about David and me and what do we want to do for dinner or for fun.  Suddenly, we’re grown ups.  

We have real responsibilities; Katherine and Caroline are counting on us to be mature and make the right decisions.  This is from the woman who still likes to eat cookies and ice cream as an entrĂ©e.  

However, David and I aren’t just parents.  We’re parents of twins.  We have entered a special fraternity of parents of multiples.  It’s a “by invitation only” fraternity.  

Strangers will introduce themselves and tell us that they are twins also.  Instantly, we find that these “strangers” are fellow fraternity members.  We’ll see other parents of twins at the mall or supermarket and give each other a nod and a smile.  How were we so lucky to be extended this invitation?  

David and I recently went to a Halloween party for other parents of multiples.  At these events, our Suburban of strollers (a double tandem Snap N Go) is no longer such an anomaly.  

In fact, we saw a stroller for triplets. “Wow,” we said “three babies!”  So you see, I feel extremely fortunate that David and I aren’t outnumbered.  Compared to parents of triplets or quadruplets we’re actually in a good position.  

Imagine if we had a toddler or other children in addition to our twins!  Some days, I’m just exhausted caring for Katherine and Caroline.  Last Wednesday was one of those days.  I said to David “we just never get a break,” but then I think about single parents, parents whose spouses travel for work or are in the military overseas.  These parents never get a break.  At least we have family close by who help us.  

So, yes, having twins is a lot of work but it’s all relative.  


Gene said...

Great story. Being a twin parent really is like being in a special "club".

You guys have a great blog. When my wife showed it to me I read it from top to bottom. It was like reliving my own experience!

Thanks for the link.

Amy said...

We call our stroller the limo. My work friends simply couldn't believe how big it is. We, too, feel overwhelmingly lucky. Even though it is indeed twice the work, it is also twice the love and now that I've experienced being the parent of twins, I wouldn't have it any other way. (Yes, we are done!)

Anonymous said...

We are the parents of 8 1/2 month old twin boys! It was great to read your site and hear that someone is experiencing similar situations.
People do stop us constantly and make remarks such as 'double trouble' etc. I get offended sometimes as I don't want the boys growing up thinking they are in any way 'trouble'. Hard work 'yes' but trouble 'no'.
Most of the time, when we are not too exhausted we are just loving it.

Anonymous said...

I really love to hear "I'm a twin" or "I have twins too!" when I'm out with my boys.

I sort of blow past the "Double trouble" people, but the "Were they natural?" people deserve whatever skewering I'm in the mood to give them.